幸福

曾经把幸福挂上很多的附带条件,非得这样那样的。

最近发现,原来幸福真的可以很简单,根本不需要具体的什么;甚至借来的幸福,偷来的幸福也可以很幸福。

或许,当你不再祈求什么的时候,那一小小的幸福就会来得更难能可贵。

几个小时的小聚,闲聊近况,街边小吃,喝喝糖水,小礼物,小惊喜,游车河。。。

这一切,得来不易,对与错可能也已经不重要。

要还的终得还,珍惜当下的幸福。

2 Months Now…

It’s been 2 months now that I got back to my single life and I told myself that I had to live a life that I would do everything according to what my heart feels.

Guess I have been doing it pretty well…

I have taken up quite a few new things that I had not been doing for a long long time… I started back my volunteer work in a temple, I started mixing with more random friends without any obligation… And one big thing that I want to do the most, I WANT TO KNOW HOW TO SWIM BEFORE I TURN 31!! DAMN!!

And also, I am back to my free-style relationship… I just want back the feeling of to like a person that I just feel like “Hey, I like you” without considering any other realistic factors… Yeap, I just want to be unrealistic for a while, just a while I promise… As I don’t hope that this will go any longer… 一碌碌, I knew that this charming idiot would turn my life upside down, but hey, being unrealistic and just be stubborn right! And I was right, from the start till the end, non-stop torturing, what a torture… And still torturing my mind… Somehow, I am quite regret that I didn’t go all out, I am quite angry at myself that I am still too coward, too afraid to get hurt… DAMN! If I were to be a bit more brave and go all out, perhaps I could get something more than this…

2013…

It’s more than a year now since my last entry. I had a very challenging year of 2012. Full of challenges with my work, my family, my relationship… I had so much stress at work without direction, had so many big arguments at home, I lost my grandmother, I had a bumpy relationship…

Things are not getting any better, but I hope it will get better, soon.

I am still in my longest relationship ever, more than 2.5 years, WOW! I am lucky that he has been putting in so much efforts in our relationship, never give up, being the best listener, my best friend, my best problem solver… A person that can just ease my mind when I talk to him with all my ups and downs. Seriously, I would not know how to live through all these hiccups in 2012 without him… I know deeply that he is the one, he is the one that can give me all I want… But I don’t seem to give him what he wants, not even the tiniest simplest happiness that he wishes for. This relationship has been so imbalances all these times. I had not been loving him truly and deeply. Being the same old me, that I am always afraid of EVERYTHING, and the worst thing in me is that I am afraid of FAILURE, that makes a total failure of myself.

2013, a year that I am turning 30, stepping into the BIG 3-0, I would want to learn how to live a life for myself. I will do everything that my heart wants to do… Regardless of failure or success, I will take charge of my life, take charge of my ups and downs, working towards a complete challenging life ahead… =)

Happy New Year 2012!!

All out of a sudden, I thought of my dear magicland here. My bad, that I have unintentionally abandoned you for this long. Ah well, what to do… Life has been busy and boring, thus, nothing much is interesting…

It’s 2012, another year has passed and the Dragon year is just around the corner, very near… Hoping that this new Dragon year can bring better lucks to myself, and all of us… A better economy out there, I NEED MORE MONEY!! Money is always not enough ever since I started working back in Malaysia… The pay is just too low for the sky high living costs here in Kuala Lumpur… I miss AUD… But, I am really glad that I am home, the place where I call HOME =)

I shall continue to enjoy my boring, busy, poor… But happy life… =)

Happy New Year~!!! *I must be the only reader now* teeeeeheeeeeeheeeeee~!!!

WOW!!!

I am back for a little update since the last entry in January. It’s now end of May, it’s almost half of 2011 has gone. Many things happened in the past 6 months.

Mainly my job change. After all the challenges and experiences, I am finally now back to my comfort zone. Guess, this should be the place where I am comfortable with the most.

Life is as boring as usual, work and home on weekdays, while FOOD on weekends. Boring, but that’s what I like to do, guess this is another comfort zone. *wink*

Age is catching up, nothing much we can do, enjoy it and love it… =)

2011~!!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Hoping that this is a good new start for myself, especially my new job…

And, hoping that the confusion in me will be gone soon… I shall have a clearer view soon, I hope… Please, go away my miserableness…

Everyone, a good year to you!! Health, career, wealth, love, luck, family, friends…

Another Wonderful Fairy Tale…

I have another person, another couple and another love story that touched my heart… Leng Yein and her husband and their love story…

I have to be very honest that I knew nothing about them AT ALL before this, until one day, my friend shared with me saying that this girl was her junior back in Kuantan, and now amazing her life is now… Then, I started to read more about her, browsing through her pictures, her blogs, even her youtube… I have read many negative comments about her too, but I have to say that FROM WHAT I HAVE READ, I like her a lot!! I do not know how true are they, but I like everything that I have read… I do not care whether those are the real facts, I like her as a CHARACTER…

I love the way she admitted her pasts, even her plastic surgeries and all… I admire her talents, her career and her successful businesses… I like her body and face too, even knowing that they are parts that are fake, but I do not care, as long as they look nice to me… I do not get jealous or angry over people being pretty because of make ups or plastic surgeries… It is one of the ways to make yourselves looking good, rather than people who just sit there doing nothing to themselves and blaming on their originally ugly born faces, or commenting on others who are pretty just because they are fake by putting on some artificial substance…

And, I like her husband too, being very sweet… Again, I might not know the real person, I just like the way how he loves their BABY DINO that much, and being a man who is willing to carry a soft toy with him all the time… That is what I call sweet!! Also the very romantic proposal that he had planned for her!! OK, that might be a bit too LUXURIOUS for people like us, but it is the IDEA and EFFORTS that count!! Imagine, one can replace the advertisement banner with just a piece of CLOTH hanging on it for just that particular moment, nobody would fine you for that I guess… Then, replace with a piece of brochure or paper IN the newspaper instead of ON the newspaper… All these do not cost much, again, the THOUGHTS that count… So, there is no excuse that you are not rich enough to do a romantic proposal…

After watching the video of their love story, there was one sentence that I really like of their love life… They mentioned that they spend their dating life EATING, which I personally like it a lot!! EATING!! YUMYUMYUM!! Especially, they also mentioned that they like to eat road-side-food, which is very simple and sweet, considering that they are FILTHY RICH people…

It is seriously a fairy tale, loving it… I wish them to live happily ever after together…

Incompatibility…

Today, 10-10-10 is a very good day, a so-called PERFECT DAY… So many good things happened today… Congrats to Mr & Mrs Hee!!! LEGALLY married to each other, wishing you both living happily ever after and many many good luck continue to shin on you!!! =)

But, seeing many happy couples around that had already chosen their another stage of life, made me think again about myself, my life, my partner…

Am I or will I be compatible to whatever I have now… Or, will I just lose them anytime soon…

Seriously, I am not confident…

Lonesome…

I have a CUTE MOM at home, she is unhappy when I have friends or when I go out…

She dislikes when I go out with different guys all the time, saying that it does not look good…

She dislikes when I go out with ONLY ONE guy all the time, saying that I am giving false hope to people… Or she starts suspecting that I am in love, and then she will ask me whether I must have a BF and can not live without a BF and tell me off by saying “You have not known him long enough, be friends first…”

She dislikes when I go out with different BUNCHES of friends, saying that I am very busybody and I do not choose friends thus everybody is my friend…

She dislikes when I go out IN GENERAL, saying that I do not spend time at home and treating home as a hotel…

I really wonder what I should do… In conclusion, I shall just stay at home without any friend or any date…